Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Friday, on this stage will sit an ebony polish grand piano. The lights will dim, except for the soft glow on the stage. Guests seated in their velvet covered chairs will come to a silence from their quiet whispers. The burgundy velvet curtain will open after a brief introduction. I will walk from behind the corner of the stage, my heels clicking on the hardwood floored stage. Behind my smile I will be a nervous wreck. I will sit in front of the ivory keys, and delicately place my fingers upon them.

My songs not yet chosen at this time.
My own original composition not yet finished, my time is drawing near. My nose becomes clogged today and later starts to drain. My coughing returned last night, and my throat has become sore. This will be the first time I have ever gotten sick prior to any of performances.
I wonder, is it my nerves? Surely not. My sister sent me an email today, tickets are sold out. This will be the first time in 5 years. This made me more nervous.

I took time off today to practice and compose, I guess I will do it again the rest of the week.

I will hide my fear and my anxiety as I always do. I will sit and I will drift away. The unknown faces in the auditorium will vanish, the lights glowing above me will no longer be. I will travel to some distant place. Where? I do not know until the time comes, but when i reach my destination I will play for only one. I will relinquish all feelings inside of me upon the keys.
The applauds will come at the end and I will be forced back into the present time, together the Symphony and I will play a joyous Christmas song to end the night, in a not so joyous time.

Tonight I remain........a procrastinating composer

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